REAL Change Therapy
REAL Results...REAL Transformation
|Posted by [email protected] on May 20, 2016 at 12:05 AM|
Views from a Muse
May 19, 2016
I need help!
Are you one of those people who are always there to help others, but are unable to ask for help for yourself. I am a recovering “Never ask for help” person. I had an unforeseen medical crisis. The crisis was short term (if two weeks is short term) and the recovery was loooooong. Required a lot of “asking” for help and even worse, admiring to myself that I needed it.
Many times I had to actually say the words to receive the help. Years of staunch independence resulted in a face that did not easily show distress...or need...or panic – even when any or all of these things were going on. It seems laughable to imagine not wanting to ask friends and family for simple assistance. Little things that did not take much effort on the part of the “helper.” Things like “Please do not walk so fast.” or “May I steady myself by holding your hand?” There were bigger things of course, needing help with preparing food or getting up or down a set of stairs.
The size of the task did not matter, I felt shame and frustration for having to ask. Again, silly human foibles and limitations that we set upon ourselves. We focus a lot of time on being kind to others and far too often we assume being kind to self will turn us into raging narcissists. Self help is an acceptable phrase, let's add self kindness. Self love. Self acceptance. Your world can only become better as a result.